Sporadic Greatness Is Still Pretty Great

While I'm happy to see this blog has such great discussions on the hotness rating of Rory Gilmore (on a minute by minute account) and the proof that Dave is in fact actually some sort of midget for his family I feel that one topic has not been fully explored yet. And of course that is this season's break out show of the year, Supernatural.

For those of you who were too blinded by Rory's Hotness to notice the ads that come up ever 5 minutes on the Gilmore Girls and missed the first episode let me catch you up.

Imagine the show starting in a dark house and a mother wakes up to a baby monitor giving off (scary) static. Naturally she gets up to check on her child and finds a man looking over the child and assumes it's probably the Father and that everything must be fine, despite the odd fact that the "father" was wearing a trench coat. Hearing another sound downstairs she goes to investigate that as well and finds.....

THE FATHER IS DOWNSTAIRS!!!!!!! But then who is with the baby??????

The mother races up the stairs and all you hear is her screaming. The father wakes up and runs up stairs but mysteriously the mother is nowhere to be seen. The only thing in the room is the crib, Oh, and the DRIPPING BLOOD FROM THE MOTHER'S BODY THAT IS NOW STUCK TO CELIING! Naturally the mother then spontaneously combusts. And the greatest series opener since Six Feet Under comes to a close.

At this point I assume this may be one of the greatest shows ever, but unfortunately most of the show was rather disappointing. I ran Supernatural and some other TV shows through a highly complex statistical analysis program called MS Paint that produced this graph.



A few things to notice here. This is a graph of a show's "Dan's Perceived Awesomeness" or DPA versus time. We clearly see that Supernatural is normally under the average, but does spike well above even the Gilmore Girls for brief periods of times. Another interesting note, we can see evidence of when Rory's hotness peaked three times in a row. For more information about this phenomenon please see this report. Additional research can be found here. Also notice that even though Six Feet Under isn't even on TV anymore it is so good that it still does whatever it wants and does not need to follow the laws of time or even the boundaries of this graph.

As we study the data on Supernatural for it's first two episodes we see the first spike is clearly due to it's opener. The second spike is when they tried to shoot a ghost - I mean that's pretty bad ass thinking you can shoot a ghost. The third spike is when another character started on fire with out any reason. Again.

The most interesting part of this graph is actually the fourth spike. What happened was the beginning started with a group of people camping. Naturally I assumed that the ghost from the first show would come and send one of the campers flying the ceiling of the tent where they would bust through the tent and spontaneously combust as they fall into the sky. Just the thought of that caused the shows DPA to spike despite them never actually doing it. The rest of the show was fairly downhill and ended with what was supposed to be a "Super Predator" standing still for a full thirty seconds while it was shot at with a flare gun.

While Supernatural had a solid start it needs to change significantly to stay on the air. First of all, stop talking about the lost Dad, a plot so boring that I didn't even bother to write about it in this review. Secondly, even though last week's show ended with someone starting on fire, it was nowhere near spontaneous enough. Finally, change the name of the show to Fire Ghost. Maybe that would keep the DPA at a respectable level.